43岁了有些糟糕

1

Our next guest can be seen this weekend at the New York Comedy Cellar. Making his "Tonight Show" debut, please welcome the very funny Sean Donnelly.

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我们的下一位嘉宾将于本周末在纽约喜剧酒窖演出。这是他在《今夜秀》的首次亮相，有请非常风趣的肖恩·唐纳利。

2

Yes! We're doing it! How are you? It's so good to be here. I had so many milestones this year. I turned 43, everybody. 43 years old. Yeah.

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是的！我们开始进行了！你们好吗？很高兴来到这里。今年我经历了很多大事。我43岁了，各位，43岁，是的。

3

I look 55, but I turned 43. It sucks. I even live in Queens⁽¹⁾ now. Queens, New York, that's where I live. Yeah.

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我看起来像55岁，但我刚43岁，这有些糟。我现在甚至住在皇后区。皇后区，纽约，我的居住地。就是这样。
⁽¹⁾Queens，纽约皇后区，属于纽约比较普通群体居住的区域。

4

I used to live in Brooklyn, but then I turned 40, and they kick you out of Brooklyn when you turn 40. "Time Out" and "New York Magazine", they come to your house and they kick you out⁽²⁾.

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我以前住在布鲁克林，但等我到了40岁，他们就把你赶出布鲁克林了。《Time Out》和《纽约》杂志，他们会到你家把你赶出去。
⁽²⁾这两家杂志都称得上美食娱乐指南的典范，描绘了最时尚的纽约。此处笔者认为他在自嘲，自己的形象影响市容而不适合住在布鲁克林这个区域。

5

It's actually just a hipster with a giant scarf on a scooter. He just scoots to your house, and he just rings the bell. He goes, "You gotta go!" I'm like, "I gotta go, I gotta get out of here."⁽³⁾

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其实就是个戴着大围巾骑摩托的潮人。他飞奔到你家，按门铃就行了。他说：“你必须搬走！”我就想“我得走了，我得离开这里”。
⁽³⁾此处并非真的有人把他赶走，用戏剧化的表达40岁形象邋遢的他，是如何被时尚的布鲁克林区淘汰的。

6

I'm getting used to being older. My body is changing. I used to do acid⁽⁴⁾. Now I have acid reflux.

显示译文▼

我已经习惯了正在变老。我的身体在变化。我曾经嗑过药。现在我还有胃酸倒流的症状。
⁽⁴⁾acid，欧美流行的毒品麦角二乙胺（Diethylamide ）的俚语称呼。麦角二乙胺吸附于印有特殊图案的吸水纸上，也俗称“邮票”。

7

I also learned about ear hair. I don't know if you guys have that. Ear hair is a thing in your 40s. Nobody told me I would become a monster at 43.

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我还知道了耳毛这东西。我不知道你们有没有。耳毛是40多岁才有的东西。没有人告诉我，我会在43岁时成为一个怪物。

8

The only cool thing about ear hair is that if you're alone and you start to play with it and you're bored, it sounds like you have a tiny deejay inside your head.

显示译文▼

耳朵里的毛唯一酷的地方是，如果你一个人无聊并开始玩它，听起来就像你的脑袋里有一个小dj。

9

So you're like You're old! You don't have a 401(k)! What, wha-what, wha-wha-wha-what, Your prostate is broken. What, what, wha-wha-wha-what.

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所以你说你老了！你没有养老金！what-what-what-what...，你的前列腺坏了！what-what-what-what... (即兴表演了一段关于自己变老的Rap)

10

I had another milestone this year. I lost 60 pounds, everybody. 60 pounds. Yeah! Yeah. Some of you are clapping and some of are you like, "No, you didn't," and that's messed up.

显示译文▼

今年我又有了一个里程碑。我瘦了60磅（约54斤），各位。60磅。是啊！是的。有些人在鼓掌，有些人说，“不，你没有”，这有点刻薄。

11

I did it with intermittent fasting. 'Cause I was trying everything. I even went to a trainer at the gym. And after one of the workouts, I go, "That was a really hard workout."

显示译文▼

我是间歇性禁食。因为我什么都试过了。我甚至去健身房找教练。有一次训练结束后，我说:“那真是一次艰苦的训练。”

12

And he goes, "That was the stretching. I hate to break it to you. And you're in a Dick's Sporting Goods. I didn't really want to tell you that one."

显示译文▼

（教练）他说，“这就是个拉伸。我不想打击你。而你当时在迪克体育用品店。我真的不想告诉你这个。”

13

And I was like, "Yeah, but I used your stair machine." He's like, "That's an escalator. Do you not know that? That's crazy."

显示译文▼

我说，“是的，但我用了你的楼梯机。”他说:“那是商场的自动扶梯。你不知道吗？这太疯狂了。”

1

我们的下一位嘉宾将于本周末在纽约喜剧酒窖演出。这是他在《今夜秀》的首次亮相，有请非常风趣的肖恩·唐纳利。

显示原文▼

Our next guest can be seen this weekend at the New York Comedy Cellar. Making his "Tonight Show" debut, please welcome the very funny Sean Donnelly.

2

是的！我们开始进行了！你们好吗？很高兴来到这里。今年我经历了很多大事。我43岁了，各位，43岁，是的。

显示原文▼

Yes! We're doing it! How are you? It's so good to be here. I had so many milestones this year. I turned 43, everybody. 43 years old. Yeah.

3

我看起来像55岁，但我刚43岁，这有些糟。我现在甚至住在皇后区。皇后区，纽约，我的居住地。就是这样。

显示原文▼

I look 55, but I turned 43. It sucks. I even live in Queens⁽¹⁾ now. Queens, New York, that's where I live. Yeah.
⁽¹⁾Queens，纽约皇后区，属于纽约比较普通群体居住的区域。

4

我以前住在布鲁克林，但等我到了40岁，他们就把你赶出布鲁克林了。《Time Out》和《纽约》杂志，他们会到你家把你赶出去。

显示原文▼

I used to live in Brooklyn, but then I turned 40, and they kick you out of Brooklyn when you turn 40. "Time Out" and "New York Magazine", they come to your house and they kick you out⁽²⁾.
⁽²⁾这两家杂志都称得上美食娱乐指南的典范，描绘了最时尚的纽约。此处笔者认为他在自嘲，自己的形象影响市容而不适合住在布鲁克林这个区域。

5

其实就是个戴着大围巾骑摩托的潮人。他飞奔到你家，按门铃就行了。他说：“你必须搬走！”我就想“我得走了，我得离开这里”。

显示原文▼

It's actually just a hipster with a giant scarf on a scooter. He just scoots to your house, and he just rings the bell. He goes, "You gotta go!" I'm like, "I gotta go, I gotta get out of here."⁽³⁾
⁽³⁾此处并非真的有人把他赶走，用戏剧化的表达40岁形象邋遢的他，是如何被时尚的布鲁克林区淘汰的。

6

我已经习惯了正在变老。我的身体在变化。我曾经嗑过药。现在我还有胃酸倒流的症状。

显示原文▼

I'm getting used to being older. My body is changing. I used to do acid⁽⁴⁾. Now I have acid reflux.
⁽⁴⁾acid，欧美流行的毒品麦角二乙胺（Diethylamide ）的俚语称呼。麦角二乙胺吸附于印有特殊图案的吸水纸上，也俗称“邮票”。

7

我还知道了耳毛这东西。我不知道你们有没有。耳毛是40多岁才有的东西。没有人告诉我，我会在43岁时成为一个怪物。

显示原文▼

I also learned about ear hair. I don't know if you guys have that. Ear hair is a thing in your 40s. Nobody told me I would become a monster at 43.

8

耳朵里的毛唯一酷的地方是，如果你一个人无聊并开始玩它，听起来就像你的脑袋里有一个小dj。

显示原文▼

The only cool thing about ear hair is that if you're alone and you start to play with it and you're bored, it sounds like you have a tiny deejay inside your head.

9

所以你说你老了！你没有养老金！what-what-what-what...，你的前列腺坏了！what-what-what-what... (即兴表演了一段关于自己变老的Rap)

显示原文▼

So you're like You're old! You don't have a 401(k)! What, wha-what, wha-wha-wha-what, Your prostate is broken. What, what, wha-wha-wha-what.

10

今年我又有了一个里程碑。我瘦了60磅（约54斤），各位。60磅。是啊！是的。有些人在鼓掌，有些人说，“不，你没有”，这有点刻薄。

显示原文▼

I had another milestone this year. I lost 60 pounds, everybody. 60 pounds. Yeah! Yeah. Some of you are clapping and some of are you like, "No, you didn't," and that's messed up.

11

我是间歇性禁食。因为我什么都试过了。我甚至去健身房找教练。有一次训练结束后，我说:“那真是一次艰苦的训练。”

显示原文▼

I did it with intermittent fasting. 'Cause I was trying everything. I even went to a trainer at the gym. And after one of the workouts, I go, "That was a really hard workout."

12

（教练）他说，“这就是个拉伸。我不想打击你。而你当时在迪克体育用品店。我真的不想告诉你这个。”

显示原文▼

And he goes, "That was the stretching. I hate to break it to you. And you're in a Dick's Sporting Goods. I didn't really want to tell you that one."

13

我说，“是的，但我用了你的楼梯机。”他说:“那是商场的自动扶梯。你不知道吗？这太疯狂了。”

显示原文▼

And I was like, "Yeah, but I used your stair machine." He's like, "That's an escalator. Do you not know that? That's crazy."

1

Our next guest can be seen this weekend at the New York Comedy Cellar. Making his "Tonight Show" debut, please welcome the very funny Sean Donnelly.
2

Yes! We're doing it! How are you? It's so good to be here. I had so many milestones this year. I turned 43, everybody. 43 years old. Yeah.
3

I look 55, but I turned 43. It sucks. I even live in Queens⁽¹⁾ now. Queens, New York, that's where I live. Yeah.
4

I used to live in Brooklyn, but then I turned 40, and they kick you out of Brooklyn when you turn 40. "Time Out" and "New York Magazine", they come to your house and they kick you out⁽²⁾.
5

It's actually just a hipster with a giant scarf on a scooter. He just scoots to your house, and he just rings the bell. He goes, "You gotta go!" I'm like, "I gotta go, I gotta get out of here."⁽³⁾
6

I'm getting used to being older. My body is changing. I used to do acid⁽⁴⁾. Now I have acid reflux.
7

I also learned about ear hair. I don't know if you guys have that. Ear hair is a thing in your 40s. Nobody told me I would become a monster at 43.
8

The only cool thing about ear hair is that if you're alone and you start to play with it and you're bored, it sounds like you have a tiny deejay inside your head.
9

So you're like You're old! You don't have a 401(k)! What, wha-what, wha-wha-wha-what, Your prostate is broken. What, what, wha-wha-wha-what.
10

I had another milestone this year. I lost 60 pounds, everybody. 60 pounds. Yeah! Yeah. Some of you are clapping and some of are you like, "No, you didn't," and that's messed up.
11

I did it with intermittent fasting. 'Cause I was trying everything. I even went to a trainer at the gym. And after one of the workouts, I go, "That was a really hard workout."
12

And he goes, "That was the stretching. I hate to break it to you. And you're in a Dick's Sporting Goods. I didn't really want to tell you that one."
13

And I was like, "Yeah, but I used your stair machine." He's like, "That's an escalator. Do you not know that? That's crazy."

主要角色

肖恩·唐纳利 Sean Donnelly

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