不用换机油的车

1

But people always think I know about cars. They think I look like a guy that knows a lot about cars.

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人们总以为我懂车。他们觉得我看起来很懂车。

2

And they'll always ask me to listen to their car to see what's wrong with it, you know? And I'll do it. You know what I mean?

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他们总是让我听他们的车，看看有什么问题？我就做了。你明白我的意思吗？

3

Like, I don't want to let them down, right? So I'll listen. I go, "Ooh. You should get that checked out, man."

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因为我不想让他们失望，对吧？所以我要听。我去做了，然后（不懂装懂）说“哦，你应该去检查一下。”

4

And if you do it just right, they'll be like, "You know what? I will get it checked out." "I appreciate that. I wasn't. But I will now."

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如果你装得像，他们会说：“你知道吗？我去检查一下，我很感激你的帮助。”“我没检查过。但我现在要去。”

5

And I know a little bit about cars because I wrecked a bunch of them. I feel like if you wreck enough, you learn what a car can do, what it can't do.

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我对车略知一二，因为我撞坏了很多车。我觉得如果你撞了足够多的车，你就会知道一辆车能做什么，不能做什么。

6

What it can't come back from, you know? And for a while I was driving a 1982 Buick LeSabre.

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你知道吗？有一段时间，我开着一辆1982年的别克LeSabre（别克名使）。

7

Alright. Real big car, you know? Used a lot of gas. And I used to make this joke at work. I'd be like, "Man, that car uses so much gas, I bet it's using gas right now in the parking lot."

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好吧。真正的大车，知道吗？油老虎。我以前工作的时候常开这个玩笑。我会说，“伙计，那辆车耗油太多了，我敢说它现在在停车场都在消耗油。”

8

That's a great work joke. People love that. One guy didn't get it, though. He goes, "Hell, you might have a leak."

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这是个很棒的工作笑话。人们喜欢。但有一个人没听明白这个笑话。他说“见鬼，你的车可能有个窟窿”。

9

I was like, "No, I don't think so." But I did have a car that leaked a lot of oil for a while. And I like that in a car.

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我说“不，我不这么认为”。不过呢，我有辆车有一段时间漏了很多机油。我却喜欢车的这一点。

10

Like, you leak a little oil, pour a little in there. Leak a little oil, pour a little in there. Never get an oil change.

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比如，你缺了一点机油，倒一点进去。缺一点机油，再倒一点进去。永远不用换机油。

11

People are like, "When is the last time you changed the oil on this car?" I'm like, "It's changing right now." Okay? This car is efficient. I used to drive that car all over the country. You know, leaking oil everywhere.

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人们会这样问，“你上次给这辆车换机油是什么时候？”我这样说“现在正在换着。”看吧？这辆车效率很高。我曾经开着那辆车走遍全国。你懂得，机油漏遍了全国。

1

人们总以为我懂车。他们觉得我看起来很懂车。

显示原文▼

But people always think I know about cars. They think I look like a guy that knows a lot about cars.

2

他们总是让我听他们的车，看看有什么问题？我就做了。你明白我的意思吗？

显示原文▼

And they'll always ask me to listen to their car to see what's wrong with it, you know? And I'll do it. You know what I mean?

3

因为我不想让他们失望，对吧？所以我要听。我去做了，然后（不懂装懂）说“哦，你应该去检查一下。”

显示原文▼

Like, I don't want to let them down, right? So I'll listen. I go, "Ooh. You should get that checked out, man."

4

如果你装得像，他们会说：“你知道吗？我去检查一下，我很感激你的帮助。”“我没检查过。但我现在要去。”

显示原文▼

And if you do it just right, they'll be like, "You know what? I will get it checked out." "I appreciate that. I wasn't. But I will now."

5

我对车略知一二，因为我撞坏了很多车。我觉得如果你撞了足够多的车，你就会知道一辆车能做什么，不能做什么。

显示原文▼

And I know a little bit about cars because I wrecked a bunch of them. I feel like if you wreck enough, you learn what a car can do, what it can't do.

6

你知道吗？有一段时间，我开着一辆1982年的别克LeSabre（别克名使）。

显示原文▼

What it can't come back from, you know? And for a while I was driving a 1982 Buick LeSabre.

7

好吧。真正的大车，知道吗？油老虎。我以前工作的时候常开这个玩笑。我会说，“伙计，那辆车耗油太多了，我敢说它现在在停车场都在消耗油。”

显示原文▼

Alright. Real big car, you know? Used a lot of gas. And I used to make this joke at work. I'd be like, "Man, that car uses so much gas, I bet it's using gas right now in the parking lot."

8

这是个很棒的工作笑话。人们喜欢。但有一个人没听明白这个笑话。他说“见鬼，你的车可能有个窟窿”。

显示原文▼

That's a great work joke. People love that. One guy didn't get it, though. He goes, "Hell, you might have a leak."

9

我说“不，我不这么认为”。不过呢，我有辆车有一段时间漏了很多机油。我却喜欢车的这一点。

显示原文▼

I was like, "No, I don't think so." But I did have a car that leaked a lot of oil for a while. And I like that in a car.

10

比如，你缺了一点机油，倒一点进去。缺一点机油，再倒一点进去。永远不用换机油。

显示原文▼

Like, you leak a little oil, pour a little in there. Leak a little oil, pour a little in there. Never get an oil change.

11

人们会这样问，“你上次给这辆车换机油是什么时候？”我这样说“现在正在换着。”看吧？这辆车效率很高。我曾经开着那辆车走遍全国。你懂得，机油漏遍了全国。

显示原文▼

People are like, "When is the last time you changed the oil on this car?" I'm like, "It's changing right now." Okay? This car is efficient. I used to drive that car all over the country. You know, leaking oil everywhere.

1

But people always think I know about cars. They think I look like a guy that knows a lot about cars.
2

And they'll always ask me to listen to their car to see what's wrong with it, you know? And I'll do it. You know what I mean?
3

Like, I don't want to let them down, right? So I'll listen. I go, "Ooh. You should get that checked out, man."
4

And if you do it just right, they'll be like, "You know what? I will get it checked out." "I appreciate that. I wasn't. But I will now."
5

And I know a little bit about cars because I wrecked a bunch of them. I feel like if you wreck enough, you learn what a car can do, what it can't do.
6

What it can't come back from, you know? And for a while I was driving a 1982 Buick LeSabre.
7

Alright. Real big car, you know? Used a lot of gas. And I used to make this joke at work. I'd be like, "Man, that car uses so much gas, I bet it's using gas right now in the parking lot."
8

That's a great work joke. People love that. One guy didn't get it, though. He goes, "Hell, you might have a leak."
9

I was like, "No, I don't think so." But I did have a car that leaked a lot of oil for a while. And I like that in a car.
10

Like, you leak a little oil, pour a little in there. Leak a little oil, pour a little in there. Never get an oil change.
11

People are like, "When is the last time you changed the oil on this car?" I'm like, "It's changing right now." Okay? This car is efficient. I used to drive that car all over the country. You know, leaking oil everywhere.

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杜史迪·斯雷 Dusty Slay

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